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I am breaking down. I never thought planning my wedding would bring so many tears. My fiance is great, very supportive, but a little too passive. My mother is getting upset with our laid back attitude. Tim and I are not very religous, though I was raised catholic. We both love the idea of an outdoor ceremony outside. The wedding wkend we will staying at a cabin looking over the lake near where we grew up and plan to have a family friend officiate. But my mother says she can't "picture it". She can't imagine what guest will do outside. I tell her the same thing they'd do at the church only without walls or a roof. Then she beings in the weather... I say it's a chance I'm willing to take. But it bothers her a lot I guess. How can I ease her concerns without feeling like I'm pushing our wants (she is paying for nearly everything, her choice and no other kids, and we've kept cost very low... this things is going to total out way under 5k).
I feel you're pain. I'm sorry to hear you're Mom gives you guys hard time. I wanted an outdoor ceremony myself. (we decided to go away) I love nature. I think the best decoration for the ceremony beyond all drapes and such will be nature. You can't top that in beauty. That will keep the cost don't by not needing fabrics and flowers to decorate. Maybe you should take you Mom for a visit to the location and come up with an idea that you guys both can live with. Like maybe a tent if the weather isn't promising for the weekend. Best of luck with the planning.
Happy One
"To the world you might be one person, but to one person you just might be the world"
An outdoor wedding would be amazing... and I agree with Happy One about getting your mom to go see the location. You do take your chances with the weather but even rain can't stop you from getting married, right?
Posts:
246 |
Location:
Ontario, Canada |
Registered: Sun March 14 2004
Personally, I wouldn't worry about your hubby-to-be being passive. I think there are a few brides on this board who wish their future hubbies were a little passive. At least it's one person you don't have to worry you might get into an argument. Also, you said he's supportive which is fantastic!
Outdoor wedding... upset mum. Tough spot to be in. On one hand you are thinking (and quite rightly too) "it's MY wedding", and on the other hand you don't want to look a gift horse in the mouth and you don't want to upset your mum. Not really sure what to say about this one. I understand her not being able to picture it. Some people cannot visualise things. Myabe you can find a few photos of outdoor weddings that would have a similar setting to what you would like. Then, like HappyOne said, take your mum to the place you are concidering having the ceremony and show her the photos and explain the layout. Walk through the place saying things like "this is where the altar will be" etc etc. Maybe that would help a little. Having a "plan B" in case it rains is a good idea. If not a tent, you could make it a fun feature of the ceremony and hand out (as your wedding favours) umbrellas in your wedding colours!
IdeaGirl "passionate about design"
Posts:
731 |
Location:
Athens, Greece |
Registered: Sun January 11 2004
Can you provide a little more on why your mum is upset? Is it because she wants a religious ceremony, or just has her heart set on you getting married in a church?
Since the weather is unpredictable, you need to have a back-up plan... like a tent, or if you are getting married at a resort-type place they usually have their own back-up plan for you.
I was recently at an outdoor wedding in May. Fortunately the rain held off until after the pics were taken. The guests faced the lake and it was gorgeous. The officiant incorporated as much religion/tradition as the bride & groom wanted (it was a combined religious ceremony) and they were even able to decorate the arch/altar so that it gave the "church" atmosphere. The groom's parents were against an outdoor ceremony originally but were pleased after it was all over and admitted it was better than they could have pictured it.
Hopefully your mum will come around. Keep us posted!
I'm actually considering an outdoor wedding myself. my FH really likes the idea, he brought it up- Central Park. i would say it's your wedding 'have it your way', but maybe u can get your mom help you "plan" the outdoor wedding. since she is paying for it. it might help her feel better about the outdoor wedding if she actually has a part in it. Good Luck with everything.
